The Successful Homosexual

Interviewed by Chuck Taylor

(Names and places have of course been modified)

Your name, please?

Pat for Patrick-O'Connor.

Occupation?

Cop.

Division?

Highway. Age?

43... no, wait, 44. Next month's

my birthday.

Are you a homosexual?

Yes.

When did this start?

I can't remember, but I was young.

Were you a homosexual before entering the police force?

Yes. As I say, I was only ten or twelve when I started playing around.

What started this? An older brother. Is he homosexual?

No, he was just playing. He's married now.

How did you happen to become a policeman?

The badge, the uniform. Besides, I was always getting other people out of scrapes, rescuing kittens, cooling off bullies. I figured I might as well make it my life work. I liked guns, too.

When you applied for police training, did you have any difficulty getting in?

They were glad to take me. I was a big strapping fellow, always was. I can see that.

If you're wondering how a homo could get on the force, forget it. Who can tell? I looked the part of a he-man, so I never had any trouble.

one

My trouble's getting a trick who'll believe I mean business. I feel sorry for a lot of guys, truly sorry.. How's that?

The way they look. They're taken for queers, when they're not at all. It's a screwy, mixed-up world.

Do others on the force know about you?

Nawh. They never give me a tumble. Kid me once in awhile, is all.

About getting married?

Yes.

Are there many homosexuals in police work?

Same as in anything else, I suppose. It's hard to tell, because of the physical type and size you have to be, to get on the force. Also, anyone who was, would be pretty quiet about it.

Do you know any others?

Yes, I ran into one from a different town. I know one here. I have my ideas about a couple others, but it goes no further than that. I let them live their own lives, same as they let me alone.

Do you like the work?

It can be monotonous. You have to be so careful not to let it make a bum out of you.

How is that?

You have so much time on your hands. You begin loafing. Another thing is the temptation.

People offering you bribes? That too.

Meaning?

Everywhere you go, people always want to make pals with you, buy you a beer, do favors for you.